I don't understand why I'm afraid of other people. I have the tendency to care about what others think, hence, insecurities. It made me realize that we are all the same. Even though we're very different, on a very general, basic level -- we're all the same.

We are having the same experience; we all hurt, we are all confused, we are all human beings trying to figure things out. It doesn't really matter where we live, what we look like, what language we speak or what side of the tracks we live on -- we have been sidetracked by television, movies, the rumor mill, newspapers, by people we know, and worst of all ourselves. During this time, our lives have been crying out to us -- begging to be lived.

We need to make ourselves realize that everyone we deal with suffers the same disappointments, heartbreaks, insecurities, embarassments and sadness that we do. Nobody's perfect and mistakes will happen every day, it's more or less just a matter of time until you are the person doing the stupid thing that makes no sense.

So maybe with this understanding, we ourselves, can be more understanding and patient when dealing with others. Also consider what effect things may have on your goals and dreams, I have found that many times there is no direct effect on anything that's truly important -- and there's really no good reason to get as upset as I used to.

Strangely enough, this one understanding all in itself has reduced so much stress in my life. Constantly dwelling on how and where other people are wrong is rarely of any value at all. Constantly dwelling on every way that things won't work is also of very little value, but constantly dwelling on the things you want and the ways you can get them is one of the most important things you can do.

The differences in human beings, are in truth, how we are most beneficial to each other.If everyone was the same size, shape, color, religion and came from the same place where everyone spoke the same language and wanted to same thing -- we would never learn. Also, we would be much less helpful to one another.

Think about it on a very simple, real level. If you need help moving, you're going to want some of your more hard-working and strong friends to help, right? If you need help reaching something high, you'll want your tall friends help. There are many experiences in life and we can't know them all by ourselves.

We learn from each other all the time without even trying, imagine how far we'd get if we actually respected and valued the different people for their experiences that we so greatly benefit from. We all want to the same things -- reasonably good health, financial security, fun, happiness, peace of mind, a sense of meaning, and less pain.

If we can't agree on anything else, can we at least acknowledge and agree that every living person -- regardless of color, gender, preferences, etc. all have heads. As stupid as it sounds, it's accurate -- you and I and everyone else have heads. Inside those heads are minds that all work the same way.

Let me repeat that and think about it -- every person on this planet has a head, with a mind, that works the same way yours does. We all want better things, we all want to do a little better ourselves and it doesn't always work out that way, because we're not focusing on that anymore. We're paying too much attention to the little trivial things -- 'that person looks or sounds or smells different than I do', 'other people are always disappointing me', 'I don't know what I can do', 'look at everything that person has', 'I wouldn't do it like that', etc.

Nothing outside yourself is nearly as important as you think it is. What matters most is that you know what you want and you're doing everything you can, to make these things happen. If we really want the things we say we do, then you'll realize, accept and start living by the above statement. 'What do I want?' 'How can I get it?' 'I want this so bad I can see it, I can feel it!', and many more positive statements.

These thoughts and statements (and ones like them) are the sign to show you that you're going the right way. Think about it; at all the worst times in your life, what were you really thinking and saying?

Was it more like: 'this sucks -- I'm never going to be able to do this', 'I can't stand this', 'look at that idiot', 'I can't believe how stupid I am', 'this is never going to work', 'I just don't have the time', 'I'm always so miserable', 'I don't know', and things like that? We do know! We just need to stop being lazy and figure it out. Find a way! What would you need to do? What do you need to learn? What new things will you have to become comfortable with? (and that's an important one). Figure out what you want.

That is the essential base for having a better life. Yes there are plenty of details, yes there are some other subtle steps, there are thousands of ways to put things so that even more people can understand -- but this is one group of fundamentals, that if practiced, will get you much closer to that ideal vision you create of things.

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