What is my portrait of God? Which of God's personality attributes do my actions prove are the most important to me? Which are the least important?

As of today, I feel absolutely lost and insecure. Life has turned its tables on me, and God has removed and taken everything from me. But to come to think of it, they weren't mine to begin with. How silly of me.

Everything I have are simply privileges, and I'm really ashamed of this proud attitude of mine. Maybe I don't know my maker completely. I think of him as a genie. I don't really see him as my Savior, Father, and King. I don't feel or see his grace, mercy, faithfulness, and compassion. I see him as a kill-joy, someone jealous, and this huge enigma.

But perhaps it is because I don't know him at all, and I don't understand. It's about time I put my complete faith and trust in him, even though everything seems futile. I am absolutely sorry, because of my negative spirit that has hindered me from growing and getting to know my Father.

This is going to be hard on my part because I recommitted myself and I'm sure that Satan will do whatever it takes to bring me down and stray me away from the right path I've chosen to take.

Lord, please help me. I need your strength, guidance, and assurance. I have surrendered and I am giving my life back to you. Mold me, use me, walk beside me. Abba Father have your will. I love you, Lord. Please help me.

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